Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
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