You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
woke up with 15 BAGS of hot dog buns in my passenger seat... jameson strikes again
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Ran into a tinder match at the bar last night. We spotted each other and started making out without speaking any words to each other. Fuck yea technology!
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Randomize
