You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I really don't think you should have 'baptized' your tattoo in vodka the same night you got it.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
