whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
See, the Lortab wasn't working enough, so I thought "hey, vodka can speed that up! That's how science works!" Which probably should've been my indication that the Lortab was in fact working
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
