The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Being at this bar with grandma is a real cockblocker
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
This coke is making my nose hairs dance. That good.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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