My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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