Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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