Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Cause i'm hanging over the toilet bowl and thinking about your ball in my mouth is not helping
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Until you find your self finger banging supergirl in the middle of the dance floor while her friends are passing around for luigi mustache for a photo op, YOU HAVE NOT HIT MY LEVEL
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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