We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
MOMMMMMMMMMMAYYY! YOU BIRFED ME TODAYY. IM CELEBRTIN ON YUR BEHAF! THANK YOU!!!!!
I always hoped you would never inherit this side of my personality. Hon, trust me, you're a mess. Go to bed...alone. xoxoxo
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
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