I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
dude. i just ate tomato soup with a funnel. we're out of spoon-straws.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
