He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
She stared for a good 10 seconds before calling my dick "awe-inspiring", and then proceded to give me blueballs. All in all the ego boost made my night break even
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
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