her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I want to fling myself into the sun
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
My grandma just invited me to gate crash a funeral for the free food. Priorities.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
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