It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
two words: eviction party
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
this could be the second dad I've smoked weed with
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
