He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
is buying liquor on my lunch break too aggressive?
I guess you could say the date didn’t go so well since I was drunkenly Snapchatting with my ex by the end of it.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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