If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
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He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
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