If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
I'm thinking of writing "I have herpes" on my stomach in sharpie that way I'm not tempted to show my tits tonight
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She washed her feet in the sink at white castle. I want this girl in my life.
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize