I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
We were making condiment sandwiches, then her husband kept trying to get me to sleep with her. I hate being the only lesbian at the party.
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize
