WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
