He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
he aimed his bare ass at the sparkler, farted, and it really did work...i love 4th of july anal fire works
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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