I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
If my vag had twitter, what do you think it would say?
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Every concussion has its silver lining
The strip clubs here are like a safari of penis, and I'm gonna bag me a rhino.
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
Randomize
