you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
Can we please have a moment of silence for my reputation?
seeing an 80 year old woman puke in the bushes changes everything...
that's spring break in florida for ya
besides im still about 80% sure that im eskimo brothers with jerry springer
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
