At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
The sign in front of ihop says "designated drivers get half off their order"
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Randomize
