two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Randomize
