we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
please come you make the beer taste better
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
Mom chose Thanksgiving to tell me the reason I am here is because she was too tired to give my dad a BJ and too drunk to make him pull out.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
