I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I told you I'm not going to the Phillies game until we're tripping balls
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
I had to cum in my sink.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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