I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
He pulled out a red and green condom and then started humming "Here Comes Santa Claus." Happy holidays indeed.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
