That guy over there looks like a cartoon/action figure.
omg, i know.
we're too high.
Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
Plotting your own moral demise should not be this fun
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
I never imagine I'd say this, but can I ask Jeff for the butt plugs back even though it was a gift and we broke up?
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
Randomize
