ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
i will soon be in a relationship on fb
you!?
me and your mom. i mean, lisa.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize
