he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
It just goes to show you, your dreams can come true. You can hook up with your dads hot married friend.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
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