So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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