Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
I don't know whether to cheer for the free bourbon, or cry from the screaming children.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
