I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
She slapped a big dramatic bandage on my arm and people started buying me drinks...I plan on wearing a full body cast tomorrow night.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
