so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
She just used a chaser for red wine.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
Had to trim my nails cus they got too long to effectively finger myself with
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