i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
dont worry, it'll just be a conversation starter like "why did you get that pierced?" or "wow, i got arrested there too"
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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