I'm lost and stupid without you.
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
