Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
