ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
The fact that when I blacked in you were sober enough to kick me out of your roommates bed makes me question our friendship.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
I rewired his car so that every time he hits the gas the horn and the OnStar turn on every time he hits the brake the panic alarm goes off.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
