somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Do vagina's smell?
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
The struggles of a small town man whore
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
