This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
Randomize