nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
