just went to get groceries. a cashier said she saw me last night. i guess i carried a broom back from the party and swept the street the whole walk back...and i claimed to be in the cast of wicked
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A particularly funny moment you may have missed; you walked in to the basement to announce that whoever was cooking sausages had left them on the grill for Hella long, only to be told that you were in fact the person grilling. At which point you just said, "the sausages are done" and walked out
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
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