His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
Randomize
