you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
In the middle of having sex with me, she reminded me that I was supposed to call my mom that morning. My penis has never retracted so quickly.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Randomize
