billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
You were parading around the bar chugging girls drinks and then asking them if you could buy them a drink. It was actually genius
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
