My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
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javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
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You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
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