I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
You asked me if I ever met a talking rock and when I said no, you looked me dead in the eye and said today was my lucky day then you crawled into a ball and started talking...that high.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
