this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
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Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
It's a self-perpetuating puke chain.
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the doctor said its the kinda of pregnant you dont recover from
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
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