i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
she was stuffing dove chocolates in my mouth while giving me a blow job. GOD I LOVE VALENTINES DAY
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Randomize
