I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
so i told him i have my period and he put his head by my vagina and said "I HATE YOU!"
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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