she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
Randomize
