Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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